Star Trek Week: Ranking The ‘Trek’ Big Screen Adventures
by Tony Thornley
As Star Trek week wraps up the Comicon.com team decided to devote some time to one aspect of Trek that we’ve neglected all year: the movies.
Star Trek currently sits at a lucky 13 big screen outings, and like the series as a whole, they’re a huge mixed bag. Some are pretty universally beloved. Others experience mixed feelings. While yet others race to the bottom of nearly every list. So Austin, Tony and Scott each sat down separately and put some of our feelings on paper, and gave a far-from-definitive but probably hard to argue ranking of Star Trek movies.
Austin Gorton:
- Star Trek: First Contact
- Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
I got into Trek via Star Trek: The Next Generation (specifically, via my 7th grade band teacher who played episodes on the band room TV during the post-lunch activity period), and thus, when doing a personal ranking of films, I typically go with a Next Gen movie over a Star Trek: The Original Series one. But no shade on Khan, which is still a banger of a movie worthy of its general adulation.
- Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
- Star Trek Beyond
My semi-hot take is that the third (and final) Kelvin film is the best of the lot and, generally, underrated. It doesn’t have the occasional sweaty-plotting (and the need to set up all the new versions of the characters) of the first one, nor the Khan-driven nonsense of the second. It’s the Kelvin movie that feels the most like what a “regular” entry in an ongoing series of Kelvin stories might be.
- Star Trek: The Motion Picture
The key to appreciating “The Slow Motion Picture” is recognizing that it’s aping 2001: a space odyssey, not Star Wars. As someone who grew up loving Star Wars, it took me a while to fully appreciate that, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to appreciate its more languid pacing and sweeping space vistas.
- Star Trek (2009)
- Star Trek Generations
- Star Trek: Insurrection
- Star Trek III: The Search For Spock
I don’t know if it’s the recasting of Kirstie Alley or the amount of time it spends on a Spock not being played by Leonard Nimoy, but this is the TOS movie that has always felt the most like a made-for-TV movie to me.
- Star Trek: Nemesis
- Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
My hottest Trek take is that I don’t really like the much-beloved Voyage Home. I have a complicated relationship with comedy in my not-traditionally-comedic sci-fi; I don’t want super serious stories devoid of any humor (my biggest problem with the recent puppet episode of Star Trek: Strange New Worlds is that it didn’t go all-in on the premise at the end), but Trek going full-on sitcom for a film has always left me cold. And while I generally love time travel stories, Kirk (William Shatner) and co. going back in time to their past, but the moviegoing public’s present felt less “exciting adventure” and more “cost-saving adventure.”
- Star Trek Into Darkness
- Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
Tony Thornley:
- Star Trek: First Contact
- Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
- Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
- Star Trek Beyond
Probably a controversial start without a doubt. I used to flip-flop between First Contact and Khan for years, until my most recent re-watch made me realize that First Contact had the edge because Picard (Patrick Stewart) was able to look his greatest adversary in the eye, while Khan and Kirk’s conflict was entirely ship to ship or ship to planet.
Meanwhile, Voyage Home and Beyond both rank high for me because they did something different with the formula while still being distinctly Trek.
- Star Trek: Generations
- Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
- Star Trek (2009)
I know this might seem really high for Generations, but I really think it’s unfairly maligned by so many. It’s better than you remember. Undiscovered Country is a stellar movie made even better by Christopher Plummer, probably the best “high profile guest star villain” role in the film series. And 2009 is extremely well-cast and largely well-written with very fun action, but ignores so many existing rules of the franchise. Note to J.J. Abrams: a warp trip from Earth to Vulcan takes about a week, not 5 to 10 minutes.
- Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
- Star Trek: The Motion Picture
- Star Trek: Insurrection
These three are all fine in my book, but this is where to me the movies are either a bit boring, or they fall apart under scrutiny.
- Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
- Star Trek: Nemesis
- Star Trek Into Darkness
I don’t think I even need to justify it; each one of these are just not fun in my book. Hell, I don’t know if I’ve even finished Final Frontier. It’s one of those that I’m pretty sure I’ve watched, but only in pieces as I’ve caught it on cable. Nemesis gets low marks for both being a terrible send-off for the TNG crew, especially Data (Brent Spiner) and a waste of Tom Hardy. And Into Darkness is just a dog turd that would have been better either embracing an alt-Khan story, or embracing an “anti-Utopia” terrorist, or a Section 31 conspiracy, rather than trying to find something in-between all three.
Scott Redmond:
1. Star Trek II: Wrath Of Khan
The GOAT of Star Trek films, hands down. A simple premise that gets to the core of the characters with a charismatic and powerful villain.
2. Star Trek: First Contact
Easily could top the list in tandem with Khan, in just how tight and focused the film is. Another one with a powerful focused villain and story about revenge, just flipped around. It actually made the Borg scary again.
3. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
What can I say, Nicholas Meyer knows how to make good Trek. A little bigger than his first go with Khan, but just as tight with characterization and influence. Perfect way to wrap up the TOS crew journeys.
4. Star Trek (2009)
Rebooting Trek was a risky gamble. Especially with recasting characters when fandoms can often be very toxic about such things. Bold, engaging, and beyond fun.
5. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
Trek characters on Earth in the ’80s, hell yes. This one gets flack but I love it and the silliness. “A double dumb ass on you,” indeed Captain Kirk.
6. Star Trek Beyond
After shitting the proverbial bed with their second outing, the Kelvin universe Trek team turned to Simon Pegg and Justin Lin to create the most Trek-feeling of films.
7. Star Trek III: The Search For Spock
I used to believe the whole odd number thing with Trek, but as I’ve aged that silliness has been thrown away. This film has flaws, but overall it’s a pretty solid, emotional endeavor.
8. Star Trek: Generations
Look, this film gets up this high just for the Enterprise-D crash scene alone. It’s not the worst, obviously, but it’s not the strongest beginning for the TNG crew’s cinematic endeavors. Thank goodness they turned it around with First Contact.
9. Star Trek: Insurrection
I know I just gave the TNG films credit for being turned around, well the following two after First Contact killed that real fast. Imagine a really long kind of boring and dragging episode turned into a film. Nuggets of this film are intriguing but some of the story and some of the writing were hard to swallow.
10. Star Trek Into Darkness
Oh geez, this one. Had the producers just been honest about doing Khan again it wouldn’t have been quite the shit show that we got. Honestly, trying to recapture the greatest of Trek films was a fool’s errand that should have been killed the second anyone uttered a word.
11. Star Trek: The Motion Picture
The most recent film for me, as I never watched it until last year. Know how people call it “the boring picture”? Yeah, they aren’t wrong, as I fell asleep and could not care less to go back to see anything that I missed.
12. Star Trek: Nemesis
A Captain Picard clone (Hardy) isn’t the worst idea, but everything about this film is just rough. From the mind rape to the blood DNA disease and so much more. Even the cool ship smashing scene isn’t enough to boost this up enough.
13. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
What does God need with a starship, indeed. Just absolute trash of a film, born out of Shatner’s jealousy that Leonard Nimoy got to direct two of the films previously. Nothing about this film works and it deserves its place at the bottom of this list and then some.
